Grip

If she knew, it was only because the noise in her head had quieted for a moment. If she breathed, it was only because the dull ache had subsided so her chest could rise and fall and hum like it used to, so that the cold air could infiltrate her lungs and make her cold and numb and beautiful. There is never such a pain as this, a pain so hungry. There is never such a grip on your throat as when he tells you he does not love you, when he tells you that it was all for nothing, that you are not enough.

There is never such a tightness, such a loneliness, because you cannot be angry, can you? He was neither cruel nor unkind, heartless or vengeful, he simply just did not love you, anymore.

She looks in the mirror, covered in the same skin and hidden behind the same eyes and think, useless. The inside covered by the outside could not hold on to the one side of the thing that was keeping it all going. It was you. It was your hand on hers in the morning, it was whispered secrets and soft memories that have been vanquished because well, he doesn’t love her anymore, does he?

What happens now, when it was always you? It was his hand on hers in the morning, it was whispered secrets and soft memories that have been vanquished because well, he doesn’t love her anymore, does he?

There is no such pain as this, no such fear as this. Humbled by it, she picks up the pieces that have fallen all over the floor, wondering how she could ever love such a broken thing as the girl in the mirror if he could not.

Image Link

Notorious

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35 thoughts on “Grip

  1. Hi there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my zynga group? There’s a lot of people that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Cheers

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  2. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point. You clearly know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on just posting videos to your weblog when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?

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  6. Miri, what about one-sided crush? what about the longing for his reactions, even the slightest one? what if all I get in return is his silence? what if I am the one who falls for him first? what if I am also the one who has to let it go first? The waiting is too painful. The disappointment is enlarging each day. Thank you for this post as it speaks to my feelings.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. so sorry to hear you’re going through this. I dont know the answer to those questions, but all I can say is finding someone who actually cares is always better than hanging on to someone who doesn’t <3

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you Miri! I remember someone used to say “love the one who loves you instead of chasing the one you love.” It’s so entirely true, but it’s ironic that your heart doesn’t always follow what your sanity has to say. I just felt deeply connected and understood with the piece that you shared. You are amazing! Hope to see more of your posts in the future! Hope you have a wonderful day!

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Amazing post! I could actually feel the emotions and pain behind that girl.. The same person we used to love, share secrets, and do everything ; it hurts to know that person doesn’t love us anymore. The loneliness left behind in place of that person is horrific..

    Liked by 2 people

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